Are you alone at home, feeling lonely and stuck in an existential quandry of loathing and self doubt? Well now, for a limited time only, you too can get your own Fizgig Ultimate Starter Kit!!
This amazing kitten will fill your life with amazing feats of daring and action. Just look at him here!
Fizgig will be sure to mesmerize you, make you smile and laugh and take over everything that you own.
As an additional side benefit, he will fit in well with your other cats as well, who really just want to be left alone in their plastic bags.
Yes, with all these features, who could refuse such an offer? Just send in your cheque or money order and you too can enjoy some Fizgig companionship.
All sales are final, no returns.
“Okay, hooman, you shutup now!”